25 in 25: #22 join the circus

#22 no i didn't actually join the circus but i now know it is a very feasible life back-up plan. after doing a little research in the dallas area i came across something called dallas skyline trapeze. that's right, trapeze. i was intrigued to say the least, so i signed up for a class.

the facility was out in addison, so it was only a quick drive away. once christina, my fellow trapezer and i arrived, we took a look around, soaked in our surroundings and allowed fear to take over. from the looks of it, we were the only ones who had no clue what we were doing. everyone was greeting one another and chatting up a storm-- obvious regulars. then 2 others with expressions similar to ours walked up. expressions of sheer confusion and not knowing what to expect.

we were split into groups, beginners and regulars then started off with a short little prep talk. our instructor kindly asked for a volunteer to go first and everyone's immediate reaction was to stare and the ground. it was silent.

our silence was broken by a brave and vibrant newbie stepping up to the plate-- you go girl. she climbed up the ladder and swung flawlessly leaving big shoes to fill.

i was up next and i wasn't as fearless. infact i distinctly remember my fearful conversation:

instructor: "okay go ahead and put your toes on the edge and grab the bar with one hand while holding onto the pole with your left"

me: "uhm i'm going to fall."

instructor: "no you aren't, i'm holding onto you"

--- so i trusted her and i leaned out to grab the bar

instructor: "great, now let go of the pole and grab the bar with both hands"

me: "ya.. no i'm definitely going to fall now."

instructor: "no you aren't"

me: "ya... ya i am. i can feel it. i'm already falling."

as i begged and pleading and fearfully held conversation atop a platform while i mentally debated whether or not i was just going to climb back down, i jumped. i was full of doubt and focusing on the net below me. i was certain that once i left the platform the net and i would meet. instead, i swung. just like a pendulum. back and forth, back and forth. i just kept swinging.

swinging back and forth was only step 1. on the next turn i swung from my knees as my hands freely soared through the air. i then did this knee swing again as i leaned back and grabbed onto another person. for the grand finale, i did a back flip off of the bars.

the toughest part was getting over the fear of jumping off the platform. everything else was rather simple. on my second turn i decided i have to think less and do more. and that right there was what kept me going. as time went on 2 out of 4 of our group stopped swinging. it takes a toll on your hands and arms and is quite the mental game. but my mentality gave me a whole new outlook. the less i thought about it, the less fear i had. afterall with God on my side, whom shall i fear? that verse was replaying in my head the entire time, and it worked. my fears were overcome and now i can join the circus.